Before jumping into dating, it’s important to pause and ask: Am I actually ready for this? Not just emotionally, but spiritually, mentally, and practically. If you’re wondering how to know you’re ready for a relationship, especially one rooted in faith, this post is for you.
Let’s start with your inner world. Relationships magnify what’s already going on inside you. If you’re not grounded emotionally, even the best relationship will eventually reveal cracks. Here’s a quick checklist to help you assess emotional readiness:
If your identity depends on another person’s attention, you’ll lose yourself in the relationship. Solid relationships are built between two whole people, not two halves trying to become one.
If someone not liking you back sends you into a spiral, it’s a sign to slow down. Rejection is painful, but emotional maturity lets you move through it without bitterness or blame.
Desperation leads to poor choices. If you’re using a relationship to escape boredom, loneliness, or insecurity, it won’t go well. You don’t need a relationship to feel complete.
You don’t need to be a master communicator, but you should be able to express your thoughts and emotions without blowing up, shutting down, or manipulating.
Still carrying baggage from your last relationship? Still angry about how your parents treated each other? Unhealed wounds don’t just disappear — they show up in how you relate to others. Emotional readiness means you’re solid on your own. A relationship won’t fix you. But when you’re whole, it will add to your life — not fill a hole.
If you’re following Jesus, your relationships should reflect that. Here’s what spiritual readiness looks like:
Before asking for a relationship, ask yourself: Is Jesus already enough for me? If your walk with God is shallow, you’re not ready for the emotional intensity that dating brings. A godly relationship starts with a God-centered life.
Relationships aren’t just about romance. They’re meant to reflect Christ’s love, serve others, and sharpen your character. 1 Corinthians 13 isn’t just wedding poetry — it’s a roadmap for how to love well.
Don’t wait until the heat of the moment to decide your limits. If honouring God matters to you, your relationship should reflect holiness in how you act, speak, and even text.
Before you go after someone, ask God: Is this your timing? Just because it feels right doesn’t mean it’s God’s plan. Waiting on His direction now can save you years of regret later. Spiritual readiness means you trust God more than your feelings. You’re not just chasing chemistry — you’re pursuing character, purpose, and truth.
Let’s get real — lots of teens rush into relationships for the wrong reasons. Here are a few mistakes to watch out for:
Just because someone gives you butterflies doesn’t mean they’re boyfriend or girlfriend material. Attraction is easy. Commitment, consistency, and respect are what count.
If your self-worth rises or falls based on who likes you, that’s a red flag. You’re already loved and chosen by God — a relationship doesn’t define your value.
Secrecy is a sign something’s off. If you can’t be open about who you’re dating, ask yourself why. God blesses relationships done in the light.
You’re not the Holy Spirit. If someone doesn’t share your values now, dating them won’t magically change that. Missionary dating almost always backfires.
Rushing into romance without first building a real friendship is like putting a roof on a house with no foundation. You need time to see who someone really is.Don’t date just because everyone else is. Wait until you know your “why” — and until your actions reflect God’s best for you and the other person.
Waiting is hard, especially when everyone around you seems to be in a relationship. But here’s how to wait well — not passively, but purposefully.
Use this season to get rooted in who God says you are. Serve at church, study Scripture, get into community. If you want a strong relationship then, build a strong foundation now.
Your single years are prime time for growth. Learn new skills, chase your dreams, start a ministry, build healthy habits. You don’t need to “pause” your life until someone shows up.
Having strong friendships, mentors, and family support can keep you grounded and help you make better choices when the time comes.
Ask God to prepare you for what’s ahead. Not just “God, bring them to me,” but “God, shape me to be ready when they come.”
Waiting isn’t punishment. It’s preparation. When you wait on God, you never miss out — you’re getting ready for something better than you imagined.
If you’ve been asking how to know you’re ready for a relationship, start by looking inward. Emotional stability, spiritual maturity, and godly wisdom are the foundation for a healthy, God-honouring relationship. Don't let pressure — from peers, culture, or your own feelings — push you into something too soon. When God’s timing meets your readiness, the right relationship will come.
Get my book on Amazon “Are You Ready For a Relationship” — [Ready or Not? Relationships. The Visual Book for Teens and Tweens. A Comprehensive Guide to Friendship, Love, Self-Acceptance, Relationships.: A Teen’s Guide to Relationships with Purpose.: Amazon.co.uk: Amo-Mensah, Suzana Naa Amuah Alberto: 9798293716173: Books